Author: ***

In a new governmental drive to combat austerity whilst increasing community spirit, dust will be collected at celebratory dust-gathering events to be later made into functional undergarments in large dust-processing factories.

Airport terminals are re-wilded.

Nano-kittens are routinely injected into patients suffering from depression, bringing about feelings of warmth, belonging and cuteness at the molecular level.

A new measurement is introduced, somewhere between Metric and Imperial. Named Chichler, it allows for poetic measurements of physical constructs.

Nose hats are on trend, to protect small bits of delicate nose-skin from the sun.

In the face of rising legal costs, all laws are abolished.

Ties will no longer be decorative and will instead be purely functional.

Patients in hospitals are invited to share beds, to assuage shortages and make new friends.

Solar-powered dentures will become obsolete.

In a bold marketing move, Coca-Cola decide to sponsor Pepsi-Cola.